Hate...leads to the dark side.

A topic came up in my head today due to a conversation I had with a very good friend. And so I thought, what makes one person hates the other? Sometimes, you just hate the other person even if they did not do anything to you. Why? The mere looks, the voices, the hair. Whatever they have just makes you hate them. Why? Try to imagine if this is God, and He just hates you no matter what you do. You'd really be doomed. The question here is, are christians suppose to hate? Animals don't hate....that's what make them so superior and in fact, more Christ like than any human here on earth. So it tickles me whenever man say we should all be Christlike, animals are lower than us, bla bla. But from the logic and the facts that we are presented today, it doesn't seem like it. They are more forgiving, they love without limits...what else. It shall be continue. I am suppose to run now.......brother's birthday dinner. Its his 20! No more teen-age.

Stupidity and love...

People say love makes you do stupid thing, love actually makes you stupid sometimes, and if you don't want to be stupid, then stop acting like one, when you're in love. You know there are different types of people....some common ones are, when they're in love with a guy/girl....you who are their friend, are somehow told a lot about their this new partner thing. They come and show you their pictures, tell you where they went, what they ate, how their parents laugh at them, giggle till the cows come home but the funny thing is, they never think why would I want to know so much about your partner in the first place? It is like when I love my foot so much ( let's say ) and out of nonwhere I come out and tell you how pretty is my foot and oh how many miles we've walked together, oh sometimes it stinks( giggle..) but I love the aroma it gives, and bla bla. You know what I mean? Don't give me a piece of it. I know you're in love, its even better for you not to even talk to me at all if that's what you love to talk to me about. No I am not here to share that with you. Friends should share? So now when you have sex we can do threesome? I don't think so, so hey, why not you keep your love to yourself and when you're talking to me, we talk to me? Don't tell me how good looking your boyfriend is, because I am not gay in the first place and if I am, you wouldn't want me to know.
I can understand the feeling of being so madly in love and all over your partner but after a while I learn that telling the other person about that special someone of yours so much, seriously, it is not an interesting common topic. Oh but you say I love him/her so much so I got to tell the world....be my guess cause I can definitely provide you with some numbers to call, you just tell me which national newspaper you want the announcement to be in.
You can tell me all about your partner and expect me to accept it and listen happily, I mean, not that I am not happy you found someone. I am....please remember I am not that old and my memory is still working. You need not remind me with things about them every once in a while unless I ask. If you still insist you must, I shall listen but the day you break up.......you be prepared to listen to me telling you, that you are stupid and your partner is right, you're the asshole and so on. Wouldn't sound nice and comforting isn't it? Where's the rationale? The rationale is here, you continuously praised your partner a thousand or trillion times that you made him as perfect as can be, when you guys breaks up, it has GOT to be your fault and you must be the asshole.
This condition is something like what my friend said, and I think you're right phungkie...what's wrong with these `in love' people anyway? The moment you fall in love it is as if no one else should matter and you're the most important person, your feelings and your partner's.
No offence, but if you got a boyfriend/girlfriend...tell me once, and trust me my memory power, as bad as it can be, I can definitely remember it until the day you tell me you guys are breaking up. Seriously, what in the world makes you think I would fall in love with what you fell in love with? You don't wanna hear about my underwear right? Well I don't wanna hear about your partner either. And for your information its rude...cause communication is between me and you when me and you are talking. Not between you and him/her when me and you are talking. Get that right. If I wanna know about your partner, trust me I will ask.
Problem is, I don't even see you talking about your parents like that....you don't love them? Or you just love your partner 30 times more?
No pun intended...I am not so into love kinda thing...probably I've reached an age where love is no longer something I am longing for, tried it...ain't nothing special with it. So whoever read this, please do me a favour before I do something like never initiate to first say hi to you? If I used to say HI and I stopped, its probably that! ....adios

For the first shall be the last, in the kingdom of heaven.

Does it simply means, if you get the last train ticket here on earth you will be presented with first class seat up there? Well, something like that in my opinion. However, today something funny occur and my thoughts just couldn't allow it to let go. My very loved pet sister however disagree when I generalize and said that all puts those in first place tends to lose them, and those whom they let behind, are always there for them.
Have you had an occasion where you have a notebook or something but you just couldn't be bothered with it. However once upon a time when you were younger you tend to just put in photos, and writting and records there once in a while and then after a while you get bored, you throw them aside and it looks like it just disappeared from your life? You ever treasured that brand new cellphone so much you just leave everything else behind? Suddenly one day, you lost your cellphone and your address book is gone with it, pictures are bygones, nothing else is left of you and your cellphone and you just can't find it, someone just probably stole it or you just misplace it and lost it? Out of nowehere, your old notebook suddenly appears and has many things inside which may not be what the cellphone's worth to you, but certainly made you sit down in your little cozy room and flip it page by page. Where did the book came from? It was always there! It didn't leave you, you left the book. What about your cellphone? You didn't leave it to be gone, it left you! Or someone took it from you! Sometimes, well.....nothing is perfect so there's no such thing as everytime I suppose; life's like that. Things you make first, came to last and the last thing in your life became first.
Perhaps there is a hidden message in the gospel when it talks about first shall be the last. We tend to prioritize the wrong things in life. Many things of that which we want to keep and make first and foremost important top secret first class item in our life ( it can range from money, computers, PDA, girlfriends/boyfriends, friends ) can sometimes turn out to be the very thing that leave us. Somehow it is just human nature, how many times have you actually seen that when parents abandon their kids, it is actually your boyfriend/girlfriend or friend who was all the way around you and back you up, and what are the odds that you're putting in more time with family than with friends? Perhaps it is usually the other way round, our prioritization is always the other way round. And even if you did this well enough and you somehow put the right things up in your life and the least thing last, you will always see one or two things in life you put it the wrongside up, and you tend to fall back on the things that you placed last in life. Of course do not mistake this with personal interest and attitude. Its not saying that, you should now focus more on playing and enjoying and partying and put your studies last, so that one day study will all come back to you when you fall. Look at it properly, if you put your education, hardwork all last....the only thing you're probably going to fall back is still your parents, which is still right in accordance to the theory I mentioned.
Quotes and dreams and wishes are never to be used to be an excuse to slack and lay back about life. Its meant to be a cushion if you fall from somewhere you have climbed. Not a cushion for you to lay back, you have never climbed anywhere before, you're just laying there. No!

....you grow up poor, you realize it every second of your life

Now that topic was just to start this off and the later part may not be related. A continuation from the previous article of you growin up poor but you don't really realize it cause you were so loved? Some people struggle very much with being `not very wealthy', and complains about the money, wanting to make more and do whatever it takes, its really good to motivate yourself and all to work for things you want but its despicable if you put your dignity on the line. And if you grow up not so wealthy and you feel it each and every second, it probably meant one thing, you LACK love and finding more money wouldn't cure that problem brothers and sisters! Money keeps you living so you could find love, not the other way round. See, don't you think its ridiculous that you fall sick so that you can take medication? Rather than you took it because you got ill? Now medicine here would work like money, you take it when you're ill, to bring you up again so that you can go on with life. Not, you take more medicine and you heal so that you can find for more medicine. We call that drug addicts and if you're living in a world different from mine where you call these powerful people you better remind me where you live.
Second of all, the most important part I realize is there is a very very thin line that separates denial of truth, and being positive. Many, which is not even worth mentioning here but if you feel it, it really didn't mean to hit you but if it did, probably you can do something, only if you want to, if you don't, its not my life anyway right? Well, take this....a kid takes too much drug in his blood and suddenly one day died, his parent while he was alive, just didn't took the time to care for him and it wouldn't matter too much if he was out or in the house. Indirectly causing the intoxication and boom, there goes another life. Lets call this boy Jack just to make it more imaginable. And not Jack's parent, Mr. and Mrs. Thomas are too busy doin their work and stuffs and all. They didn't even realize if Jack wasn't around at home last night or not, but they're so tired, they jus went straight to bed. Be it ignorance or what, Jack has been on drugs for 2 and a half years, and one day he just drop and fell really ill, and never woke up again.
See, you can choose to respond it many ways. You can say, no, this is all the will of God and he was destined to die as a lesson to everyone out there. And console yourself, that this isn't your fault on not giving enough attention to Jack. Or maybe you could've just say that, God did all this for a purpose and we man do not know of His will so we will accept it as it is, but we know God is good and whatever He's done must be good, so this is good; in other words. OR maybe you can twist that fact a little bit and say, yea God really indeed have allowed this to happen, rather than making it happen and say I admit it is my fault. It is not good, we are not good, we let him die on us, we didn't even realize if he had his dinner or not, what more drugs? The good thing is, we finally admit our fault, what's next? Go to church and cry out loud, pray all you can and start working the next day cause life goes on, and no money no life? Of course its important to have money but remember you don't get the medicine to fall sick, you fall sick then you consume the medicine, and if you are making money in your life like as if you're living for it and you would fall sick and let go of everything because of money, don't you think its time you end your life? What do you want from those money? To be happy, to be healthy, to live well, loved....and suddenly when you start working so hard and do whatever it takes to face heartbreaks, disrespectful life, bla this and that, you're doing it the wrong way? The right way to make money is to keep the intention right. To make your loved ones happy, and putting your life or dignity down is never gonna make anyone who loved you proud nor happy. Look at your life today, and if you're not making money the right way as I am talking about here, I seriously think its about time you start to make it right. Don't go to church and pray 30 times in 29 minutes, eat the bread 3 loaf of the bread of life and drink the whole bottle of wine which rerpesents the blood. Symbolic action is nothing without the right way of life. In fact, the very thing about Jesus' last supper was that He came in clean hands and His life was all right and He ate there so that everyone remembers that you get yourself clean before you start coming to take a part of this. You cannot be perfect and no one is asking you to, but if you didn't do it right one by one, you're not even close to being right.
Once I was reading this quote somewhere and it inspires me to give faith a benefit of doubt, it goes somethin like, Christians are not good people, but people who knows they are wrong. Again, suddenly...I think that sentence mean knowing you're wrong; then fix it! Knowing itself ain't getting you nowhere. If I kill you today and say I know I am wrong, too bad. I'll just live on but I already know I am wrong, thats enough? Wow, ain't life for a Christian as easy as breathing air? Oppresion from another religion isn't the hardest part of Christian life. The hardest part comes from pressing yourself to fix things and as hard as it can be, let them slap you on the right when they slapped the left. I have yet to see a single human capable of doing that in my whole life. Don't avoid wrongdoings by saying things like; its ok, the whole community is against me and say I am wrong, this is the work of the devil and God is testing me to stand strong. If Jesus were to be like that, he would't took the cross and throw it down the valley of no end and tell the world, come and consume me and God will do me justice. National geographic won't have a program to find out how Jesus was crucified on the cross instead, where did the cross went? He wasn't wrong to begin with, but He lets you slap Him both sides. Today all I can see is, we're all wrong to begin with, and then we put some cream on the cheek and say, God will watch after me. Stop being defensive. Lets get some slapping. You will never know how Jesus feels and what God wanted in your life until you be like that. The question to close this topic; ask yourself this..do I let people slap me on the left, when they slapped my right? Or after they slapped my right, I build up a wall and say, GOD IS MY SHELTER....and be one the watch for any incoming slaps?
Truly if that was how God wanted us to be, I don't think the slap left and right thing would be in the bible wouldn't it? Wouldn't it probably be something like, when they slap you on the right......hit them where it hurts most?

The coma..

How could someone says he love god, but then he doesn't love some people? It is like saying you can love something you cannot see but couldn't love something you can see. Why is that? My ways of looking at humans is always one, humans are all selfish. Always! In any situation. It is always me first, and everyone else second even if it appears otherwise. God seems easier to love doesn't it? In most cases, god doesn't stop you from doing things, doesn't argue with you, doesn't trick you nor shout at you. Whereas humans on the other hands are different and they do whatever the opposite of what it is that the current relationship man has with god.
Is this how it should be? Christianity says `love your enemies'. In other words, love is definitely not easy in the this context. And if loving is easy in your life, then you really have to re-evaluate whether or not you are living the word or your word. There is, a vast difference!
Oh sure you can love the guy next door in a coma, he won't fight with you over anything, he just shuts up no matter what you say, and silence usually amounts to `ok I am with you'. And finally God's will becomes our own silent will. The illusionary will we self created. If anything was to be god's intend I would rather believe that making us love humans and making another human irritate us is all in his scope of studies for any of us. Yes, you don't expect god to come telling you, no I don't agree with you, why are you so stupid can you grow up get a job, and your girlfriend, she is low. Now you will start to get offended. What if god was one of us. What if someone you see today and irritates you, and you just cursed him up and down and at the end of the day, someone tells you, that was god in disguise? The ultimate answer would be, no that wouldn't be god because god being god will not do things like that, those are low things, those are evil things. You can go ahead and think like that, but start not to contradict the teaching in anyway. It is said that god is kind and god is love, yes...but they also say god is a jealous god, and also god's action and intend is beyond human's comprehension. For crying out loud you don't even know how god looks like or what colour he is, what makes you think you know him and know how he might behave or how he does things? Just cause you have a book called the bible that supposedly record million of years of his works? Think again if you want to believe that god is just the bible and nothing more, you're probably belittling him isn't it? And now suddenly god the almighty is someone you know, someone predictable, someone you can have a foresight of what he will and will not do? Don't think like that my friends. God does not need anyone to create an excuse for what he does and does not do. Even if he appears in the form of humans to test you, DO NOT give reason and say god will not be so and he can not do that? Hey, you just said he was almighty and don't you think he can do anything and perhaps he's doing something we don't even expect? So now he's beyond our expectation and suddenly you know what he will and will not do? If he is just what you think he will do, doesn't that make you higher than him and you the almighty all knowing? Don't put out possibilities of what god is and what god can do. Otherwise, don't say god is great. Because if he can only do what you think he can do or what the bible has spoken of him, and that is his limit. Doesn't he now be more like a robot and the bible, a manual for his operations? He is good says the bible. And now you interpret it as, no he won't come down pretend as a human and trick me into losing my temper to see what I will do. Suddenly the part where we always talk about that we do not know what he will do comes in handy. When one's life, a good man, charitable, loving suddenly is taken away from his beloved and what do you want to say about it? He's bad? NO! Same reason, we have no idea why he does what he did. Just because you think it is a bad thing, doesn't mean it is to him because you forgot, ultimate intend lies in his decision and scope of understanding....NOT YOURS. By the way, the bible consist of many things he is, but it also does not limit what he is. So do decide on what you want your god to be. To be the god which has a manual to tell you how to operate with you( the bible ) or the manual is nothing but a brief introduction of what he could actually do but not what all he can do, and it doesn't limits the `him'. If you've read the bible and can suddenly come out to tell what god can and will do and its impossible for him to do this nor that, then stop telling people god is great because that book no matter how thick it is, limits him and not only that it limits him, it already enables you to know him in and out ( I always thought it was suppose to be the other way round, cause we did not create him? ).
So back to the original point.....if you find it hard to love another but you could love his creator, stop being a hypocryte! For once stop giving excuses..and start doing something. It is easy to love god and not human. Did god tells you loving is going to be easy? No, it tells you everything but easy...and that is suppose to be life of christians, and if the loving you have in your life is easy...you have got to relook your love and start loving also the difficult to love and be Christ like. You do not choose who to love, you just love them all. Its easier to love the guy in coma, one who cannot fight, argues, or defend you in words you can hear or actions you can see. Stop making god a coma guy by loving him and not everything he created. This article has got nothing to do with seeking for acceptance nor asking for correction. Its an article to be read, so read and choose. It only asked you to think. Not come up with another excuse of how this is not right. If its not right you go on and live the life you thought it was right, after all, life's simpler if its your way isn't it? Anything which is difficult to do, we shut it out and find reasons for it. If you think its right, isn't it time to make some changes?
Just for the record, humans are full of excuses and reasons. Try to observe yourself or another daily and see how many times people give reasons for everything, and use the word, "..because, but then, however..."

....you grow up poor, but so loved you don't even realize it

A phrase I caught in Oprah when Eva Longoria was in the show. Chinese has a saying that goes, `...with love, you can survive with water'... as in a sarcastic way saying no way, love isn't enough. That saying wasn't meant to be like that. Of course it depends on how you want to see it or anyone else. I think its meant to be like how Oprah put it. Its not that you can live without a single cent in your pocket as long as you have love. But you can survive living the days by the day and won't even feel tortured, opressed when you are loved. Nuf said? More to come...